Thursday, February 27, 2014

Toddlers get much of their self confidence from their parents and immediate family. You really need to work at patients and understanding to teach this but it can be done.

Instructions

    1 First step is praise. Always give lots of praise. This is the best self confidence booster. When your toddler brings the dish to the sink for you or puts his shoes on by them self give them a round of applause toddlers love this. Make sure to say how good they are at everything they do.
    2 Don't talk bad about your kid when they are in the room. So many parents make this mistake. Even if your kid can't talk yet they may understand some of what you are saying. Nothing kills a kids self confidence more than saying things like they are a slow talker or that they are behind. Instead of talking about what they can't do mention what they can do. They should be over hearing positives.
    3 Let your kid know that you love them. Even if you are punishing your child say I love you, you just can't behave this way. The punishment needs to be for the behavior and not for who they are. Kids who are punished to severely by parents who are in the heat of the moment forget what they are being punished for and feel like it is a personnel attack.
    4 Teach your child. By learning from you a toddler gets a lot of self confidence. Think of fun projects and games you and your toddler can master together.
    5 Lastly don't correct your toddler when they are learning to talk. They will not get it right a lot but they will be discouraged if they are being reminded that all the time. Instead say very good and repeat the word or sentence. It will come together in time.

Tuesday, February 25, 2014

Building Self Confidence in a Kid

Posted by Setiadi On 11:03 AM No comments

How to Build Self Confidence in a Kid

All parents want their children to be confident and charismatic, but this can cause them to push their children too hard in the wrong direction. In some cases, they may take so much control over their children's lives that it causes the opposite effect, and their children become much too dependent. Treating your children with respect and giving them their own responsibilities can go a long way in increasing their confidence and self-esteem.

Instructions

    1 Give your children free time to decide their own activities. Scheduling your children's day too rigorously limits their use of imagination. Giving them time to create their own games can make them more confident and encourage their independence. This does not mean you cannot play with your children while they are doing this, but give them the opportunity to control the course of the game.
    2 Teach your children skills. Cooking is one example of skill that can instill confidence in your children. Give them room to experiment, but also make sure that they complete the task properly. This also encourages independence and confidence.
    3 Let your children practice things by themselves. Instead of doing things for your children, or taking over when they don't successfully complete a task quickly, give them time to figure it out themselves. This teaches them that they are able to overcome difficulties by themselves and do not always need to seek help.
    4 Praise and encourage your children's effort. This is different from praising the outcome. Whether they fail or succeed at a task, they will understand that hard work is important no matter the outcome. This means that regardless of how good the outcome is, they will be proud of the effort they put into an activity.
    5 Make your child feel loved. Your child should never feel as though your love hinges on their accomplishments or actions. Make sure your children know you love them no matter what.
    6 Be self-confident. It's important that you are as confident as you expect your children to be. If you have trouble with self-esteem, resolve them before pushing your child too hard. Children can tell when their parents are not as confident as they seem, so don't expect to fool them.
    7 Give your child chores. Similar to teaching them skills, making them responsible for some small task around the house makes them feel important to the workings of the family. Make them know they are a necessary part of the process, and make sure that they keep up with that task.

Sunday, February 23, 2014

Improving Self-Confidence for Men

Posted by Setiadi On 2:11 AM No comments

How to Improve Self-Confidence for Men

Self-confidence stems from a well-developed sense of self and positive self-awareness. Environment and upbringing have a significant impact on the development of self-confidence in boys that will impact them throughout their adult lives. Perception of self will also impact every aspect of a person's life from relationships to job opportunities. Building self-confidence is a critical step in mental health and happiness. The best way to build self-confidence is to learn and develop certain positive thoughts and behaviors.

Instructions

    1 Focus on strengths. Make a list of positive attributes. Start with personality traits such as kindness, patience and integrity. Identify something you truly like about yourself, whether it is your eye color or your ability to sing. Add accomplishments such as winning a game, being named as employee of the month or writing a book. Enlist the help of friends or family members to add positive qualities to your list. Find activities or hobbies for which you have natural talent and pursue them.
    2 Engage in physical fitness. Regular exercise has proven benefits including decreasing stress and weight loss or maintenance. A fit and healthy body will increase self-confidence and at the same time improve your quality of life. Try new exercise programs or sports to challenge yourself. You can also join local groups focused on the activities you like the most such as running, bowling or cycling. This will also help you meet new people who enjoy the same activities you do.
    3 Establish a list of new goals to achieve. Set small goals at first to gain a deeper sense of accomplishment. Examples of small goals might be to run one mile or learn to cook a certain dish. Track your goals on a piece of paper as a visual reminder of progress and success.
    4 Surround yourself with positivity. Talk to people you admire and respect. Seek out their advice on life, work or relationships. Obtain words of wisdom you believe can benefit your own life. Incorporate books about overcoming obstacles or success stories into your life. Give compliments to other people and do good deeds for others. The reaction of people receiving small kindnesses will improve your state of mind and demonstrate you have the power to impact people in a positive way. Write yourself a motivational note and place it in a location so you can see it frequently throughout the day. This will help you train you to acknowledge and appreciate yourself.
    5 Avoid negativity when possible. If you are subjected to negative people at work, minimize contact with them outside of professional interaction only. If you know negative or critical people in your personal life, separate yourself from them as much as possible.
    6 Use your voice. Speak up at work, in personal relationships or social settings. Share a piece of good news, a new book you enjoyed or an interesting tidbit of information that others might find interesting. Engage others in conversation to share things you have learned -- especially if you are skilled in certain areas such as cooking, computers or sports. Teach people what you have learned and become a great resource for them to learn.
    7 Review your appearance. Notice other men you consider to be well dressed. Look at their attire and personal grooming. Look in your own closet to determine the articles of clothing you feel the best in. Make sure your clothes fit properly and need no mending. You do not need to purchase an entire new wardrobe, but consider adding a few updated pieces like a nice black sweater or a sport coat. Dress in a way that makes you feel put together and polished. Stand up straight. Good posture automatically projects confidence to other people. Make eye contact with people when conversing with them. Make a habit of greeting people and looking them in the eye.
    8 Volunteer to help others in your community. Being a positive contributor to your community will not only make you feel good about yourself, you will be helping others in need. Volunteer projects come in a variety of categories ranging from overseeing bingo at a retirement community to building homes with Habitat for Humanity.
    9 Record in a notebook those ideas, positive quotes and situations that have made you happy. Use this notebook to record your gratitude. Write down at least five things you are thankful for every day. Look at the growing list daily as a reminder of positivity. Keep notes about the goals you want to accomplish and those you have achieved as a reminder of your progress.

Friday, February 21, 2014


How to Deal With a Boyfriend Who Has Confidence Problems

Self-confidence is a necessary part of having healthy relationships. Without it, we can become needy, overbearing, jealous and angry. Improving your self-confidence is one thing, but helping someone else improve theirs is a whole different task. Because self-esteem comes from within, it's often difficult to change the mind of someone else. It can be easy to get frustrated and want to leave, but it's important that you practice patience, as making these kinds of changes in personality often takes time.

Instructions

    1 Be patient. It's easy to get down when your boyfriend constantly talks about how he's unworthy. Even though you may be nice to him and try to compliment him, he could shrug it off and continue to be self-deprecating. Just realize that these changes take time. Stay persistent with your encouragement.
    2 Give him random compliments. It's one thing to compliment him back when he says something nice to you, but it will mean much more if you tell him, for example, how good he looks for no reason at all. If he combats you and says "No I don't," quickly reply with "Yes, you do," and then change the subject. Don't let him obsess on negativity.
    3 Stop negativity without giving him too much attention. We all have problems, and sometimes it's necessary to vent. But when he begins speaking negatively about himself, you need to firmly and clearly say, "That's not true. I'm serious and don't believe it for one second." While listening is essential, it's also vital that you put a stop to negativity without coddling or sympathizing too much. Giving him too much attention for these negative statements will cause him to acquire a learned behavior, where he speaks negatively about himself to get attention from you.
    4 Ask him to speak with a doctor about his feelings. Low self-esteem and depression share several of the same symptoms, including a low sense of self-worth. Your boyfriend may have depression, in which case, his doctor may prescribe anti-depressants.
    5 Encourage your boyfriend to speak with a psychologist. Even if he's on antidepressants, therapy may help him more accurately find the root of his problem and therefore help eliminate it.
    6 Set a limitation. You must learn to be patient, caring and firm when dealing with a boyfriend who has low confidence. However, you must also put a limit on how long you're willing to put up with this behavior. If he shows no will to change himself, then you may want to consider leaving. Although it's easier said than done, breaking up may be best for both of you.

Wednesday, February 19, 2014


Help Techniques in Counseling Teens With Low Self-Esteem

Self-esteem -- your perception of your worthiness -- develops during your early childhood years and can have an enormous effect on you even into your late adult years. Low self-esteem can become a vicious cycle and can result in depression, loneliness, a lack of close relationships and even suicide. Since low self-esteem is such a difficult and deep-rooted issue, overcoming it may be difficult, but it is possible. There are many help and counseling techniques available for teens with low self-esteem.

Identify the Cause

    In order to fix the problem, you first must identify the problem. What is it that causes some teens to have low self-esteem? It is often necessary to examine the teen's childhood in order to answer this question. Much of our self-image is developed at an extremely early age. Our initial relationships -- most specifically, with our parents -- especially influence our self-image. Were the parents neglectful, overly critical or abusive? These factors very frequently lead to low self-esteem. What about the relationships of the teen? Does the teen have many close relationships, or mostly just acquaintances? Loneliness or feeling isolated can also lead to low self-esteem.

Psychotherapy

    Low self-esteem is an extremely deep-rooted, longstanding issue. Its development is very early on and therefore your self-image is something that tends to be very prevalent over time. Psychotherapy may be the best form of help for a teen with low self-esteem. A trained professional psychotherapist understands how to identify the underlying factors and which of the various counseling techniques should be implemented.

Think Positive Thoughts

    Thinking positive thoughts: it might sound a little ridiculous, but it really is true that one negative thought perpetuates more negative thoughts, and one positive thought can turn it all around. When you have a negative thought about yourself, there are two things that you can do. First of all, either say out loud or in your head: "Stop!" The idea is to make you aware of your negative thought so that you can consciously decide to avoid that negative thought. The other option is the rubber band method. Wear a rubber band around your wrist and when you have a negative thought, lightly snap the band against your wrist. This is not meant to be self-destructive or overly painful. It is a well-received conditioning technique which helps you to realize when you are having a negative thought and avoid having that same negative thought in the future.

Get Involved

    Doing things that we love or excel at helps to improve how we see ourselves. Write down a list of things that you enjoy -- hobbies or activities. Then, determine a few ways that you can get involved in these activities with other people. Teens generally have a great number of options for extracurricular activities, such as joining a sports team, joining clubs in school or volunteering for a local charity organization. Whatever it is that you choose, make sure that it is something that you enjoy. The more you enjoy yourself, the better you will feel, and the more likely you will be to meet and develop close relationships with people who are interested in the same things as you.

Other Tips

    1. Realize that when you make a mistake, this is not a reflection of YOU or your worth. Brush it off -- everyone makes mistakes!
    2. Exercise. Getting into an exercise routine is beneficial for both your mind and body.
    3. Realize that perfection is an unrealistic goal. Allow yourself to be proud of your accomplishments.

Monday, February 17, 2014

It's devastating to learn that your husband cheated on you. You feel betrayed and wonder why you weren't good enough for him. However, you need to move on and get your self-confidence back after being cheated on. Take things slow---you're still tender---but take control of your life. You are an amazing person that deserves the best things in life. Do whatever you need to boost your self-confidence.

Instructions

    1 Realize that the problem was him. Your husband probably has a hundred excuses for why his cheating is your fault. It isn't. Don't take the blame for his behavior. Understand that his weakness and his selfishness led him to cheat. It has more to do with him than with you.
    2 Force yourself to go out. You may be feeling depressed and embarrassed, which makes you want to do nothing but sit in front of the TV with your favorite snack. Don't do this. Make yourself go out for a walk, be social with your friends, and have a good time. Try doing an activity that you always wanted to do, but couldn't because your husband didn't want to.
    3 Get a makeover. Whether you want a haircut, some new makeup, a manicure, or a sexy new outfit, changing the way that you look can make you feel better about yourself. You don't have to spend a lot of money on this. Even something small can make a big difference in improving your self-confidence.
    4 Spend time with your friends. Your friends are the ones that love you no matter what. In a time like this, they should help lift you up. Going out with friends can also prevent you from being alone and wallowing in your depression.
    5 Start an exercise routine. Exercise releases endorphins, which causes you to be happier. While cardio exercise is great, don't forget to include strength training, which will make you feel strong. Core exercises are also essential because they improve your posture and make you stand taller.
    6 Say Hello to strangers. When you are friendly and outgoing, people like you. You may also find that a handsome man flirts with you. In general, having positive interactions with people throughout the day is going to put you in a better mood. When people are friendly back to you, you feel more confident.

Saturday, February 15, 2014

Making Myself Have More Self Confidence

Posted by Setiadi On 2:05 PM No comments

How to Make Myself Have More Self Confidence

Self-confidence is not necessarily inherent to some people and requires work and focus on your more positive qualities. Improving your self-confidence is no easy process, but the benefit is the rise in your self-worth and self-esteem, both of which contribute to a healthy amount of confidence. There are a few key ways to make yourself have more self-confidence.

Instructions

    1 Talk to yourself. This might sound silly, but affirmative mantras can help to boost your self-confidence. Look in the mirror and give an account of your best attributes out loud. Repeat this process daily, both in the morning before you leave and at night before you go to bed. The old adage applies here: if you tell yourself something enough times, you will start to believe it.
    2 Engage in activities that make you feel better, stronger and more in control. For example, if you are a fairly passive person, enroll in a kick-boxing class and take out some of your inner turmoil and uncertainty with every kick. If you are creative, take a painting or pottery class and enjoy watching your hands create something amazing. When you do things that you are good at and make you feel good while doing them, you tend to have more confidence in yourself overall.
    3 Maintain good posture. Even if you don't feel confident on the inside, project as such on the outside. Eventually, your insides will catch up. Walk tall and proud, with your shoulders back and head held high. Make sure your back is straight and your strides are strong. Good posture and a strong walk convey confidence.
    4 Give compliments to others to make them feel good. When you boost other people up, it tends to make you feel better in return. If you want more self-confidence, devote yourself to doing for others what you may not be able to do for yourself. Watch how, over time, you start to feel the same way about your own positive attributes.

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