Abusive Experiences
- Emotional, mental, physical, sexual and verbal abuse all impact the way a woman views herself.
The nefarious aspect of abuse is that it harms a woman's image of herself even if it was unjust, criminal or simply enacted out of immaturity. Many women were bullied repeatedly at school as girls. Even though this may have been done by aggressive, immature and even emotionally disturbed children, a woman's esteem of herself may suffer for a lifetime.
Sexual abuse, by family members or by strangers, at an early age, is one of the strongest assaults on a woman's self esteem. Because being a woman often means seeing herself in relationship to others, women face the danger of putting too much emphasis on how others see and treat them. If they are abused, self-abuse can easily follow, which diminishes self-esteem.
Absorbed Negative Messages
- A woman can lose confidence in and esteem for her self-hood and personality by absorbing negative messages from abusive, overly critical or malicious personal encounters. These negative messages can reach a woman in a dysfunctional family, through the loss of a job or in an especially bitter divorce.
A woman can also absorb negative cultural messages that erode feminine self esteem. Ultra-thin models assault a woman on the cover of magazines as she shops, goes to the movies or watches television and highlight, by contrast, what appear to be the woman's physical inadequacies.
Insufficient Comfort
- Finding herself in a situation where she must cope with insufficient emotional or physical comfort for long periods of time can also erode a woman's self esteem.
If a woman works hard at a taxing job that offers her little pleasure, or lives alone when she is not the loner type, or suffers financially or experiences significant pain from physical ailments, chances are the woman will suffer from low self-esteem, blaming herself consciously or unconsciously for her uncomfortable life circumstances.
Unattainable Expectations
- A woman's own unattainable expectations can also deprive a woman of positive self-esteem. If she subscribes to the notion that she must be a Super Mom, look like a model or lose weight quickly, satisfy her husband's every whim and have a brilliant career as well as perfectly behaved children, she is bound to be disappointed in herself.
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