Children who have low self-confidence may be more likely to do badly in school or have less friends. A child who thinks he's no good at math or that no one likes him may just give up trying. Parents and teachers can help by finding things that the child is good at and recognizing him for a job well-done. Even if it's something as small as finally learning to spell a word he's struggled with, tell the child that you're proud of how hard he worked. Every little word of praise will help him feel more confident.
Give the child opportunities to master something. If he wants to make a batch of cookies, let him. You can be on hand to do any tasks that aren't safe for him to do, but giving him the chance to do something by himself will make him feel proud of himself and capable.
Let him make mistakes. If he drops the eggs, don't jump in to take over. Let him clean up the mess and keep going. If you try to take over, he'll feel like he's not capable of doing something for himself.
Praise his efforts and success. Say, "These cookies are delicious. They taste different than usual. You did something special to them!" If the cookies taste terrible or don't even resemble cookies, don't pretend that he made great cookies. Instead, let him know you're proud he tried so hard and did something all by himself without giving up.
Find an activity that he will enjoy. Sign him up for a sports team or art classes. Give him some options of different activities he might like and let him choose which one to join. Letting him try something new will again let him realize that he has talents and that he's a hard worker. Any activity that involves working with others will also help him make friends and learn to value himself as a member of a team.
Encourage his friendships. Offer to have his friends come over for a sleepover, or take them all out to play miniature golf. Talk to each child and get to know him a little, then fade into the background so your child can build his own relationships without your help. Get to know his friends' parents as well, so you can all touch base if any of the children are having problems. Friendships are key in helping a child build confidence. Having friends will help him learn to communicate with others and will help him feel confident outside of the safety of home.
Check in with the child frequently about his friendships and how school is going. While driving in the car or helping him get ready for bed, ask how everything is going. Bullying is a problem at nearly every school, and being picked on by other children will destroy a child's confidence. Ask if other children are nice to him or if he's having any problems getting along with others. If he mentions any problems or seems to dread going to school, schedule a meeting with his teacher. Asking these questions a few times a week will help you discover any problems before your child's self-esteem is too badly damaged.
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